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Thursday, June 07, 2007

I'm Trying to be Positive (it isn't always easy)

Hello!
What a week or two its been, I've been flat out trying to get everything done. Work is manic, it always is at this time of year. Being at school camp last week left me behind with a load of stuff to catch up on at home. I feel like I've hardly stood still (except for watching The Apprentice last night but that was a have to do!)

With all the stress of everything I'm actually really pleased that this cycle was delayed. If things had gone to the original time scale we'd be smack bang in the middle of it and I can't imagine how stressful it would be to fit in appointments. I'd also worry about the stress I'm under and if it might have decreased our chances.

Tonight, straight from work, I had the hairdressers. I'm not really into the 'treat' element of a trip to the salon. It's more a necessary chore, today however, I was looking forward to the break. Two and a half hours of sitting still and chatting. Bliss.
As the first few foils were applied a girl was placed next to me. I didn't really notice at first until her hairdresser started talking about hormones. Yup, you've guessed haven't you? Of course, she was pregnant.

Over two hours of pregnancy talk. A surprise baby. Not particularly wanted by all accounts. The continuous moaning of how life would have to change. How much she was sacrificing. How she was fed up with being pregnant. I tried to glance and see how far on she was, I couldn't get any idea due to the gown but during the conversation it transpired she was eight weeks. Eight weeks and fed up. Sigh.

On our cycle news- Drugs have been ordered. Down regs start 18th June assuming no cysts at scan ( please no cysts) and the rest will pan out after that.

My lady at acupuncture was asking how my mood was and if I was up and happy. I was trying to explain how anxious I was. She said I have to be joyful and hopeful. I answered that although that sounded like a jolly plan I was struggling to get there. She replied by saying 'No struggling. You will do this anyway so no worry, You embrace it.' I was about to dismiss this comment as her not understanding but, with a little more thought, I see what she means.
So I am.

12 comments:

Mindy said...

Regarding what your acupuncturist said: I know this will sound very PollyAnnaish and crazy since I've been in a foul mood for the better part of a year now, BUT... I recall taking some class in college (sooooo many years ago) that included some focus on the mind/body connection. I remember reading something about how even if you don't feel like it, if you smile it can improve your mood. And I swear sometimes I do think it's true. It might not make you want to skip and sing, but I do think sometimes you can will yourself to be in a better mood.
And on that note, I'll go back to my own complaining. ;)
Good luck. Hope you're feeling better soon.

Erin said...

I absolutely admire your attempt to be positive! I'm trying the same thing, but it is so hard. (Especially when whiny pregnant ladies end up next to you at the salon. So cruel!) Let's vow to keep each other positive. This next cycle will be the one! Rah! Rah! Rah!

Congrats on the drug order! (What an odd thing to congratulate someone for.) But it is an exciting step. I hope you'll post the pics!

Good luck getting through this crazy time at work and then again on the 18th.

ultimatejourney said...

I really have to try acupuncture. It sounds amazing.

I'm glad the timing of the cycle worked out for the best. I can't wait for you to start!

Ms. Planner said...

How I admire your calm grace not to freaking throttle the ingrate pregnant lady at the salon. At least this struggle has taught us all to be conscientous around others, so we do not behave like her.

I, too, am so in need of a little positivity. I will totally take on the challenge of becoming more positive and encouraging y'all to do the same. Good for you for getting the ball rolling on it!

xoxo, Ms. Planner

Here I am said...

Hi- I happen to come across your blog and I couldn't stop reading. You have worded everything so well, I kept thinking to myself "this is me! this is me!" It's so comforting to know you are all out there, going through and feeling the same things, especially when so often I have felt so alone in this journey. Anyway-- enough blabber. I appreciated your recent post, as I too am on a mission to be positive and I pray it works for all of us. Good luck on your journey and thank you for being out there!

dmarie said...

You're right, it isn't always easy. Trying is such a huge part of it I think. Good for you and the accu is a positive thing you're doing too!

Tam said...

Not long to go now, time will fly by, you'll see. Before you know it your little embies will be back safe and sound!

Try and keep the faith sweetie, it is hard but this too will come to an end one day, you'll look back of-course but you will have your precious baby!

Cibele said...

Thanks for your kind words on my blog. I really appreciate it. I want to wish the best of luck on your upcoming cycle. Hugs

Natalie said...

why do they always sit next to us and gripe? man oh man.

One View said...

Sorry you had to deal with the whiny pregnant women at the salon. Why are so many so incredibly ignorant? I know how hard it is to be stay positive but I think you have the right attitude. Good luck with your next cycle.

Mama Bear said...

"You will do this anyway, so no worry." I know that's so simple, but that's a great point. Worrying doesn't change the outcome...but, boy do I wish I could figure out how to be that zen!

And so sorry about the whiny pregnant lady at the salon! Is there no escape for us all?

Anonymous said...

don't you just "love" people like that! They seem to be everywhere, like a plague of locus :)

Your acupuncturist has a good point, but its always easier said then done, unfortunately!

oh and I just lurrrve the lake district, how I miss it. one of the most beautiful places in England or is it in Scotland?

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